This is part two of one of my previous posts, Kind of funny conversations.



This one happened in my office. I was sitting in my cabin (not working :D), trawling the net for a good camera. I’m smitten by cameras with fancy features (about which I don’t know a thing), big lenses ( which I don’t know how to use) etc., the cheapest one of which will cost at least Rs 21000. Anyhow there I was, drooling over the specifications and sighing on reading the prices when one guy came in for chit chat. He used to be a tour guide before he joined this company. After taking a look at my screen, he goes like :

Him: So, you’re going to buy a camera ?


Me: Yeah. If I can find someone to buy my kidney or liver.


Him: Uh ?


Me: Never mind.


Him: You know, I have a really good ipod lying around at home. Never ever used it. A German tourist gave it to me when he was going back. He thought that he had too much luggage.


Me: Nice. Why don’t I meet such generous people ? [[sigh]]


Him: You know, you can use that ipod with your camera. I don’t have any use for it.


Me: Uh ? Ipod with camera ? How does that work ?


Him: You are thinking of buying that camera worth 22000 and still don’t know about that ?


Me: Seems like that.


Him: Hah. You just put your camera on that ipod and take pictures when you need it really steady.

I stare blankly for a while and then it hits me.

Me: Are you talking about an tripod ?


Him: yes yes,. wahi tripod.


Me: Hmmm.


Previous Part

0830 Hours IST
30 October 2010
PPC World News Broadcast

In a surprising development in Pakistan, General Beg a few minutes ago appeared on Pakistan TV and radio claiming that he had quelled the rebellion by some of his subordinates that had threatened to shove his nuclear armed nation in to a bloody and very dangerous civil war. Reading from a prepared statement he said that most of the rebel officers led by General Asgar have either been killed or arrested facing further trial. He assured everybody that things are under his complete control and urged everybody to get on with their lives as usual.

But international observers are far from convinced. Pointing out to the still raging battles inside major Pakistani cities, they say that General Beg’s claims of quelling the revolt are far from true. His opponent, General Asgar has powerful allies both within and outside Pakistan and forces loyal to him still control coastal city of Karachi and parts of disputed region of Jammu & Kashmir. Further, many influential Islamist groups based in Pakistan have come out openly in support of General Asgar, mainly to show their disapproval of what they say General Beg’s sucking up to USA for money. Two of these groups have taken over the the controls of civil administration in Peshawar, Malakand and Quetta
General Beg not only has to control his nation’s armed forces but also these powerful Islamist groups that threaten his grip on power more than anything. These group hold just more than significant influence on Pakistani civilians as well as serving and retired defence personnel. Therefore earning their support is going to be vital if he wants to consolidate his position.
How he manages to gather their support without antagonising his western allies is a matter of debate itself. Regarding this matter, no less importance should be attached to Indian reaction. It becomes still more important right now as it suffered 3 deadly terrorist attacks in a single day killing nearly 300 people, allegedly by Islamic terrorists supported by the very same groups that Beg needs to appease.

This news broadcast is brought to you by PPC International. Please stay tuned for more

Previous Part

0900 Hours
29 October 2012
LMU News Broadcast

A bearded news reader was reading the news report, “Already strained relations between India and Pakistan worsened after Pakistani army started unprovoked firing on Indian positions on LoC in J&K; yesterday. Additionally, Pakistani soldiers also attempted to wrest control of three Indian posts in Poonch and Kargil. Although they were beaten back with heavy losses, Indian army too suffered some causalities. Although officials declined to specify the exact number, according to sources Pakistan suffered 97 dead or seriously wounded while 17 Indian soldiers lost their lives. These skirmishes between the two nuclear armed neighbours couldn’t have happened at a worse time. Pakistan is on verge of breakdown after a senior army general attempted a coup against serving army chief General Beg minutes after he had assumed Presidential powers. This came after a series of bombings all over Pakistan, one of which injured Pakistani President Naqvi and killed his son.

Ruling PPP to which Mr. Naqvi belongs however strongly protested General Beg’s attempt to dismiss the civilian government. In a press conference, senior leaders strongly condemned General Beg’s actions and vowed to launch a country wide protests against any move to undermine civilian rule. Former Prime Minister Wasim Akhtar, a bitter rival of Mr. Naqvi vowed to support PPP in it’s campaign against General Beg, much to surprise of political pundits. Though most people seem to think that he is doing it to avoid anybody linking him to attack on Mr. Naqvi. General Beg on the other hand, has not appeared in public after a near fatal kidnapping attempt. All attempts to contact him have proved futile, although sources close to him assure that he is alive and well.

Governments from all over the world have urged both nuclear armed neighbours to act with restraint but their pleas seem to be falling on deaf ears, at least in Pakistan where nobody is clear about who is calling the shots. There seems to be a power vacuum at the present with too many people fighting amongst themselves to decide who wears the crown. To make matters even worse, various Islamist organisations, many of them linked to Al Qaida and Taliban have taken over control of numerous places including areas near Durand line and even small towns adjoining Lahore, Peshawar and Karachi. An alliance of Baloch nationalist parties and militia has declared a virtual war by laying siege to 2 army bases in Balochistan province and taking more than 900 Pakistani soldiers hostage. Lines outside airports and embassies of western countries like Canada, US are much longer and crowded than usual as more and more people are looking for a visa and the way out of this mess. At such a time these unprovoked attacks on India by Pakistani army seem nothing more than a ploy to distract the attention from real issues plaguing the country.

A press release from Pakistan home ministry however claimed that everything is in control and blamed India for adding oil to the fire of Pakistani troubles by first supporting insurgent movements inside Pakistan and then trying to grab Pakistani territory. Issuing a strong statement Pakistani officials claimed that the Pakistani citizens will defend the sovereignty of their country to the last of their breaths and will not bend over due to external pressure. They also appealed to concerned countries to help Pakistan in it’s hour of need.
The release further added that all of Pakistani nuclear weapons and delivery platforms are in safe custody and accounted for. But many analysts fear that jihadis might already have taken control of a few nukes.

Indian defence minister in a press conference held last evening expressed the same apprehension and called for concerned people in Pakistan to find a peaceful way out of their predicament. He claimed that India will offer any amount of help in order to help Pakistan extricate out of this messy situation. He also denied that India was trying to take advantage of turmoil in Pakistan.

Even as we speak scale of firing has come down considerably. But small arms fire is still going on in 2-3 places.
Now we show you a video shot yesterday morning in Uri, Jammu where Pakistani army fired mortar and machine guns on an Indian army team which was trying to repair a breach in the fence. A well known TV journalist was right there shooting a documentary when the firing started. We have obtained the full length tape and will be showing it in entirety.”

He then added with only a slight hint of an ironic smile, “Viewers are warned that this video contains graphic language. Uhh and violence too. Some people might find it disturbing.”

Then they started running uncut video recorded by cameraman Sidhesh last morning at Point 711, Uri. Unlike the edited version shown on UNDE TV, LMU version showed everything starting from Varsha Butt’s confused face as first mortar landed to her tantrums when Sub. Gurung was trying to stop her from killing herself. Lakhs of people saw it on TV and many more on YouTube and other online sources.

The bearded news reader thought with a quite smile, “ Say bye bye to your Pulitzer, Ms. Butt. You won’t have it in this life at least

Previous Part

Lying in the bunker, he nodded off listening to sounds of gunfire and explosions outside. He didn’t knew how much time had passed since he had passed out. All he knew in his confused and drugged mind was that something had changed. Lying on his back as Hariom had left him, he tried to ascertain what had happened. It was not the pain which was nothing more than a throbbing dull ache that started from his injured shoulder and spread like waves through his body. He tried moving his arm but it was still immobile. He tried to sit up but was overcome by giddiness and immediately dropped back. Cursing the Paki soldier that had shot him he lie still for a moment. Then it hit him.
Firing had stopped !
The loud bangs of grenade explosions and bullets was now replaced by and the sounds of distant men talking amongst themselves. He strained his ears to listen but was unable to hear anything intelligible. What had happened while he had passed out ?
Had Indians beaten off the Paki attack ? If so, why no body had come to check on the injured ? He looked around to take stock of his surroundings. Only source of any light was a battery powered light lying on a box in the distant corner. By it’s light he could make up the shapes of other injured soldiers lying besides him. All of them had received painkiller shots and were either unconscious or sleeping. There was nobody else.

What if Pakis had over run the post ? A cold shiver ran through his spine at the thought. That was entirely possible they way they were attacking and would have done so within minutes unless Indian reinforcements arrived. Even without knowing the time, he knew that reinforcements promised by Col. Saha should’ve been there by the time he was shot. Were they too late coming to aid of their comrades ?

His panicked thoughts were interrupted by sounds of footsteps coming towards the bunker. He propped himself on his uninjured arm and strained his ears to listen. By the sounds, he realised there were 3 men walking on the path outside the bunker and would be inside in a minute. A cold sweat broke over him. What if these men were Paki soldiers intent on killing the wounded ? Or worse capturing and then torturing. Pakis are not exactly famous for humane treatment of prisoners of war. Capture was going to be much worse than death. He tried to raise the soldier lying closest to him, but he had suffered a head wound and a broken arm and was administered a generous morphine shot. He didn’t move a bit even when Subhranjan kicked him. By this time, sound of footsteps was even closer.

Swearing under his breath, he abandoned the idea of trying to wake up any other soldier and started looking for a weapon. Using all of his will power he forced himself to get up and walked unsteadily towards the pile of boxes near the light. He still couldn’t move his injured right arm and opened the lid with his other hand. Instead of any weapon, the box contained rock climbing gear. Cursing his luck again, he attempted to open other box when somebody turned the door handle. For a moment Subhranjan froze to the spot, remembering that he had forgotten to lock the door from inside. Now nothing could stop them from getting in. In desperation he lunged to the box he had opened previously and grabbed a small rock climbing hammer lying inside and turned off the light plunging the bunker in complete darkness. He felt the hammer in his hands. It was barely 11 inches in length and weighed a kilogram at most. Now the door was opened and Subhranjan stuck himself to the wall besides it as it opened. A streak of light entered the bunker through open door and 3 men entered inside one by one. His heart wildly beating he raised the puny hammer in his left hand and waited. One of the three men lit a torch and started walking towards the injured Indians while the others stood back. Subhranjan slowly walked out from behind the door, his left hand raised and sneaked up to the backs of two men, intending to knock them down with the hammer. There was no way in hell he could be able to take them all but it was much better to die fighting than being captured alive by Pakis. He reached within an arms length of the the two men and steeled himself to strike. Just then, voice of a puzzled Hariom startled him, “Where the hell is Lt. ? I left him right here !.”

Waves of relief rolled down Subhranjan’s body on hearing the medic’s voice. He wanted to shout with joy, but could only manage a stifled croak, “Hariom ! Is that you? You frigging son of a bitch ! “

A startled Hariom moved the flashlight towards source of the voice and nearly screamed when he saw a wild faced Shubhranjan waving the hammer dangerously behind the other two soldiers. To his credit, he controlled himself and said in a comparatively calmer voice, “ Drop the hammer sir. It’s us. We’ve beaten back the Pakis.”

Subhranjan dropped the hammer and promptly plumped down on his ass, “That I’ve managed to figure out myself.”

“Uh..then why this hammer sir” ? One of the soldiers that had come too close to getting his skull split at the hands of the Lt. Asked with some trepidation.

“Oh, that! I was just playing safe. Just in case.” Subhranjan managed this with a perfectly straight face. “Leave all this. Tell me what happened while I was here.”

“Reinforcements arrived within 5 minutes of me leaving you here. Subedar Major Salathia arrived just in nick of time with 20 men and kicked the hell out of enemy. We had to stop him from chasing fleeing Pakis down the mountain. You should’ve seen it from your own eyes. It was a sight to remember.” Hariom flashed one of his very rare grins.

“Where is he now ?”

“He is still outside, standing guard along with rest of men against a possible counter-attack. But I doubt it’ll happen any time soon. Pakis have suffered too many causalities to mount another attack.”

“Did we lose any more of our men ?” Subhranjan asked with some disquiet.

“Thankfully no. Five more soldiers did suffer shrapnel and bullet wounds but none of them serious. Just the same, a Dhruv will arrive at dawn to evacuate the wounded and the dead. Additionally an UAV will be in air within 20 minutes. You can rest easy now.”

Subhranjan let out a sigh of relief and relaxed. Suddenly he started feeling too tired to even sit up and he lay down on his back thanking his stars.

Previous Part

A group of Paki soldiers escaped the notice of Indian defenders and snuck up through the middle face of the peak.Although one of the machine gun positions on the northern side saw them, they managed to scramble out of it’s arc of fire without taking any causality. A 2 man team broke out from the group and started crawling towards the machine gun bunker from it’s flank, intending to destroy it using grenades. Subhranjan saw one of them when he stood up and tried to throw a grenade. He at once shot the Paki who collapsed after getting hit by a 3 round burst. His companion however managed to throw a grenade towards Subhranjan before being shot himself. It landed just 2 feet from the trench where Subhranjan was and exploded before he could duck completely. Shrapnel from the grenade injured right side of his face and shoulder and the blast nearly deafened him. He collapsed on floor of the trench dazed, bleeding and and ears ringing. HariOm was on his side in an instant and started dressing his wounds.

“You have a nasty wound on your cheek. It’ll need stitches.” He had to shout to make himself heard over the din of gunfire.

“That can wait.” Subhranjan managed to mumble but not without wincing in pain. “Where is my gun? “

Hariom was surprised, “Uh what? You are in no condition to fight. You need to get out of here.”

“Unfortunately these damned Pakis wouldn’t let me. Will do anything you say once I see off these uninvited guests.”

He gingerly touched side of his face and winced with pain again when tried to lift his gun. Hariom looked on with concern, “Do you want a painkiller injection ?”

“Thanks, but I’ll pass. Now go take care of other wounded.” Subhranjan replied as he tried to take stock of the situation again.

The Paki group that had manged to sneak in through the middle had taken cover behind a group of large rocks. One of the soldiers had an Under barrel Grenade Launcher (UBGL) on his AK-56 and was trying to fire on the machine gun bunker closest to him. Although the bunker had taken a direct hit, soldiers inside it had been unharmed. But their luck wouldn’t hold on in case of another hit. Now, they were trying their best to keep that Paki from firing his UBGL again. Subhranjan realised what was going on and ordered one of his riflemen to move in closer to him. He saw the machine gun firing on the rocks behind which Pakis were hiding. After a few seconds machine gun had to stop firing for a magazine change. Pakis were waiting for just this kind break. As soon as the gun stopped firing, the Paki with UBGL popped out and tried to fire. But he had neglected to watch out for enemy outside the bunkers and paid the price with his life as soldier with Subhranjan shot his head off.

But their relief was short lived as another Paki soldier picked up that UBGL and managed to fire off one grenade on the bunker before being shot dead. Although the concrete bunker was too strong to be destroyed, it was damaged partially causing a blind spot in it’s arc of fire. Surviving Paki soldiers took advantage and charged towards Indian positions on it’s side that happened to be right where Subhranjan was. They charged towards the Indian trenches lobbing grenades and yelling loudly. This attracted attention of rest of the Indian riflemen who at once directed their fire towards the advancing group. In spite of the rain of bullets, two Paki soldiers managed to reach right up to the edge of trenches before being shot dead.

By this time another group of 9 Paki soldiers from the northern side had managed to avoid the bullets of Indian defenders and had take cover right where the earlier group had. Much to the surprise of Indians, this group too broke cover and started another charge at the Indian position. Even with the hail of bullets being fired on them, 3 of the charging Pakis survived and jumped in to the trench trying to engage the defenders in hand to hand fight inside. Two of them died without making any mark but one managed to fire off a burst from his AK-56 before being shot dead. One of the bullets hit Subhranjan in the right shoulder. He lost hold of the rifle and fell down writhing in pain. One Indian soldier immediately moved closer to him and put a bandage on his wound trying to stop the blood loss. Somebody had shouted for the medic and Hariom was there within moments. He took out a quick clot kit from his bag and poured the granular powder on the wound. Much to everybody’s relief bleeding stopped within seconds and Hariom covered the wound with a bandage. Along with another soldier he started moving an almost unconscious Subhranjan to comparative safety of a bunker in the back.

As they gently set him down in the bunker along with other seriously wounded, Subhranjan regained consciousness and attempted to get up. Hariom stopped him and gently shook his head.
“What happened to you ? You’re covered with blood !” Subhranjan exclaimed on seeing him.

“Well, it’s not mine.” Hariom replied, trying to avoid looking him in the eyes.

“What ?”

“We lost 2 more men in last ten minutes. It’s their blood.”

“Bloody hell! These mad Pakis will pay for this.” Subhranjan shouted with rage and tried to get up. But he stumbled and would have assuredly fallen on his face if Hariom had not caught him.

“ Do you want to kill yourself ? That bullet has shattered your collar bone and probably nicked a major artery. I’ve given you a painkiller, that’s why you can’t feel the pain. And after that shot, you’re in no condition to fire a gun either.“ Hariom shouted sternly.

Feeling weak and delirious due to blood loss Subhranjan could do nothing but to let Hariom set him down. “But my men need me there” He whispered weakly.

“Sure they do, but they need you alive. You can go out to fight as soon as I feel you can. Till then, please lie down and try not to kill yourself. For your soldiers sake if not your own. Now, I have to go outside and see if anybody else needs my assistance. Don’t move till I come back.” With this Hariom gathered up his medical kit and ran out of bunker towards the fighting line, leaving Subhranjan lying on his back with three other wounded men besides him.